Summer Update

We've had a great summer and look forward to the fall. She'll begin 2 mornings (Tues & Thurs) of nursery school around the corner. The same week she will begin a 12-week session for adoptees from China (2 to 3 years old) and their parents to expose them to Chinese culture, 
language, and dance. I'm looking forward to it. We want very much to keep her connected to her culture until she's old enough to make her own decision on how much she wants to be involved.

Attachment & Adjustment
Katerina appears to be happy and well-adjusted. She is definitely bossy and likes to be in control. I'm learning to avoid power struggles where they don't matter. She laughs a lot, particularly with Joseph. There's nothing I love more than to hear her giggle.

She's getting too used to me not being around during the week. I get to spend about 20 minutes with her when she wakes up before I have to leave for work. In the evening I get home around 7pm or 7:30pm. "BaBa" is her main man. He does the whole morning routine; breakfast, diaper change, etc. He also has been coming home early most evenings because he can't wait to see her. As a result, she always chooses him over me. There are mornings where I'll go into her room to pick her up and she's standing in the crib; when she sees me she flings herself on the mattress and wails "BaBa". Although one morning when I had to leave early, before she woke up, Constantin tells me she looked for me in the bed, said "MaMa" and then looked for me in the bathroom. I' m rethinking my schedule at work and instead of staying home on Fridays, maybe I'll come home early a few days a week.

Play Dates
Katerina & I have joined a playgroup hosted by Kathy Miller. We've gotten together several times to date and the kids have a blast. They vary in ages; Katerina & Sonia are within a couple of months of each other; Ally is almost a year older; Katie and Jenny are 3 1/2. Kathy's house is a regular playground. They have a bouncing castle, rubber mats, a parachute for Gymboree style activities, a fabulous playroom with a kid roller coaster, every toy you can imagine, in the playroom. We meet every two weeks and plan to get together for Autumn Moon Festival where we will look at the full moon and eat mooncakes.

During the Yuan dynasty (A.D.1280-1368) China was ruled by the Mongolian people. Leaders from the preceding Sung dynasty (A.D.960-1280) were unhappy at submitting to foreign rule and set how to coordinate the rebellion without it being discovered. The leaders of the rebellion, knowing that the Moon Festival was drawing near, ordered the making of special cakes. Backed into each moon cake was a message with the outline of the attack. On the night of the Moon Festival, the rebels successfully attacked and overthrew the government. What followed was the establishment of the Ming dynasty (A.D. 1368-1644). Today, moon cakes are eaten to commemorate this legend. 

Health & Behavior

Speech: She's repeating every word she hears and starting very slightly to put two words together. "More please". When Constantin couldn't find the Mei Mei DVD that she was requesting in the bedroom, she led him to the stairs, pointed to the family room and said: "Mei Mei down". When he went downstairs she led him right to the DVD case that was on the divider between the office & the family room. She then pointed to her chair and said: "Chair up". She has really perfected NO. Sometimes she makes it 3 syllables: Nooooooooo. Sometimes it's in clipped repetition: No, no, no, no, no.

Growth: She saw the doctor July 17th and is healthy. She grew 1" and gained 1lb. She's still in the 15th percentile for height & 5th percentile for weight. By now (August 31) I'm sure she's grown more. She looks taller. Her foot size seems to have grown to size 4.5 from size 3 at the beginning of the summer.
Eating: She still eats like a champ. In the mornings she has cereal or eggs, after which she has fruit. Her favorites are blueberries, melon, and apples. We had a terrible scare one afternoon when she was choking on a grape. Constantin (I wasn't there) said she was turning blue and no sound was coming out. He did the Heimlich maneuver and it worked the 2nd time he applied. The grape came shooting out. We've since done research on foods that can choke and are making sure that one of us is always around her when she eats.
Sleeping: She goes to bed between 8:30 and 9pm. She recently started asking for a pillow so I went to Buy Buy Baby the other night and got her "Toddler's First Pillow". It's a hypoallergenic pillow that is "breathable"; you can't smother if you put your face in it. She's so proud to have her pillow and actually smiles when we put her in the crib. I wonder how long that will last!

Outings and Fun Time
Katerina took swimming lessons this summer and will begin again in mid-September. She's a natural and loves the water. Even in the bathtub she turns over on her stomach and kicks her legs while moving with her arms.







JHHLS Employee Picnic was held at Hollybrook Hill which is like a day camp for kids of all ages. They have all sorts of activities. She was a star, of course.





Sunset Fun - A few times we packed up sandwiches and went to Croton Point Park to watch the sunset or to Playland Park to watch the fireworks. She loves these outings. Joseph's friend Addie has joined us a couple of times.







Blessings - Our adoption was blessed by Father Costas during Sunday mass on 8/6 in St. Basil's chapel. Constantin takes Katerina to church quite often and she has the run of the place. She's greatly improved since the time she blew raspberries during a Holy Week service and we've learned not to bring potato chips with us.







Companions - In addition to Nancy, we have Angela 14 years old come over a couple of times a week for a few hours to play with her. Nancy and Katerina have also made friends with another babysitter and her 2 kids (girl's name is Katerina!) from around the block. They go to the playground together, have had a picnic at Katerina's house and have gone to the library together.



Musical Munchkins - Almost every week we designate a night where Constantin, Joseph, Katerina and I get musical instruments (2 wooden spoons, for example), put on about 45 minutes of children's music and dance around the family room. She loves it.

Beach: Several times to Oakland beach and once to the Connecticut shore to visit Michael & Mary.
Sesame Place: See separate post.
4th of July: See separate post

Notable moments:

• She learned how to jump and jumps constantly; even from a throw rug to the floor!
• She discovered Barney. Gail claims Barney has gotten a bad rap, but I don't know, there's only so much of him I can take.
• We can now read an entire children's book without her grabbing the book and playing with it. Her two favorites at bedtime are: Goodnight Moon and Goodnight Kiss.
• She likes to walk down steps without help or holding on. We are not too comfortable with that however and put ourselves in front of her to protect if she stumbles.
• She puts on her shoes (and takes them off). She even secures the ones with velcro. The other day she put on a pair of my flip flops correctly. She sometimes puts on my high heels; a classic toddler activity. She tries to put on her clothes as well.
  
  Parent Milestone: We had our first night out without her. We went to a friends party and asked Nancy to sit for the evening. We came home at 10:30 and she was still up running Nancy ragged. She wouldn't go to sleep until we got home.

Sesame Place

Just got back from 2 days at Sesame Place. The place was crawling with kids!! That's Cookie Monster devouring my little girl in the first picture. I finally learned all the characters' names by the time we left. Before arriving I only knew of Elmo. We unexpectedly ran into Kathy Miller & family within the first 10 minutes of arriving. I knew they were going to be there at the same time but made no plans to meet up. Even more surprising was to run into Cindy, Jerry, Jessica & Paige (adopted from Russia) the next day. We had no idea they would be there. They were celebrating their 1 year "Gotcha" anniversary. It was a lot of fun. Even Joseph had a good time. We had a 1 bedroom suite (small) at Hampton Inn & Suites which was perfect. Joseph slept in the living room and Katerina slept in a Pack & Play in the bedroom with us.






























She was terrific when we went out to dinner both nights. She's learning table manners. She watched us lift the napkins from our laps and wipe our mouths. She then began wiping her mouth with the tablecloth!

Adjustment Period

I've decided to continue this blog and post to it periodically so that it will serve as a journal for Katerina. But first, I need to catch up on the last 3 ½ months.

WOW, It's been over 3 months and we are finally establishing a routine. I think the adjustment might have been easier for Katerina than for Constantin & me. Our world of 17 years or so changed overnight and I've had to let go of things that used to be (or so it seemed) important to me; like a neat house. The house is always trashed. The living room is her playroom. We have baskets for toys but there's always a Leggo somewhere to found. A toy kitchen and small table and chairs reside right next to the dining room table; neither of which match our decor! I am back to work full time but am deeply grateful for the flexibility my boss and the organization give me. I am able to adjust my schedule to maximize time with Katerina by working extra hours on one day, short on another, working from home when it makes sense (saving 2 hours in commuting time), etc. We have a full-time sitter who lives around the corner and comes to our house from 9am to 6pm. Nancy is full of energy and although she tells us she often collapses once she gets home she seems able to keep up with Katerina. She’s gentle and caring and plays with Katerina constantly and also works on teaching her things through play.

It’s hard to get personal paperwork and other things done around the house. Thank goodness I'm so organized to maintain a to-do list and therefore am always up-to-date on what I'm not accomplishing. As we get more into a routine, I’ve slowly been chipping away. Example: This past weekend I caught up on the last 5 months of bank reconciliations.

Attachment & Adjustment  She is adjusting well and attaching to us. She’s still very independent, but seems to know that we are her “home base”. When I come home she runs to me smiling, saying Ma Ma and puckers her lips to give a kiss. She hates Monday mornings after spending a few days with us at home. When Nancy shows up on Mondays, she often turns to one of us and holds her arms up for us to pick her up.

Play dates, Playgroups and other Organized Activities
Katerina is very sociable and outgoing. When meeting strangers, she is initially quiet while sizing them up, and after about an hour she becomes noticeably comfortable and her personality comes out. She attended the spring semesters of Gymboree and Musical Munchkins. During circle/lap time she preferred to go into the middle of the circle and dance or intensely watch the "teacher" as she played an instrument or worked with a prop. At Gymboree, she made remarkable progress in using the various apparatus and now gleefully climbs on and through everything like a little monkey. For the summer, we have signed her up for Locomotion, a Gymboree type class closer to home and swimming lessons at Club Fit. I have decided that we will host our own Musical Munchkins type of session at home as I can not find a convenient time & location for this. At minimum, Joseph, Constantin, Katerina and I will set aside forty-five minutes once a week for structured musical fun. I will create playlists on my iPod and will try to incorporate the various techniques used in these classes; singing, movement, musical instruments, rhythm, etc. We may even invite some “guests” to join us now and again to make it more fun.

We are so lucky that one of our best friends, Chris & Kate have a daughter around the same age. Tess and Katerina have gotten together several times now and enjoy each others company. She has also had a play date with a couple of families from FCC; Ally who is about 1 year older than her and Sonia who is about 1 month older. On the 4th of July, she met Paige who is a couple of months older and adopted from Russia last year by Cindy (Deb’s sister) & Jerry. They had a fabulous time together which resulted in some adorable pictures.

















Speech & Understanding  It’s amazing to me how much she understands. Words or concepts that I didn’t even think we had uttered previously. She’s an incredible mimic and will try to imitate body movements as well as speech. She has not yet put sentences together but knows a lot of words. I stopped recording after a while but in order to document, I will include her first words here:

Ba Ba, Ball, Bath, Bike, Boo Boo, Bird, Bubbles, Bye-bye, Car, Cheese, Cow, Down, Ear, Eye, Fork, Ge Ge, Go, Good Girl, Goodnight, Hi, Joseph, Juice, Kitty, Light, Ma Ma, More, No, Off, On, Out , Pajama, Please, Spoon, Thank you, Time, Uh oh, Up, Yum-Yum

We’ve stopped recording because she is now repeating so many words when she hears us speak them.

Outings & Events: Over the past few months we’ve taken our show on the road a few times.

Bronx Zoo:
She’s been to the zoo twice since her arrival; once in early April and then again in July. Her interest in the exhibits was much greater in July. On our first outing, she seemed more interested in other kids in strollers than the animals. Her mother also had a few things to learn about outings. I neglected to bring an extra set of clothes so when she generated one of her mega-poops it got all over her and the clothes she had on and I had to take her out of the zoo wearing only a fresh pamper, socks & shoes. I now travel with no less than 2 extra outfits and on one recent occasion had 8 (included 2 swimsuits)! The trip to the zoo in July was terrific. Joseph and his brother Anthony came along and not only had fun but were extremely helpful. Joseph pushed the stroller the entire day. He and Anthony traded off with me when holding her up was in order and they both took her through some of the hands-on exhibits in the children’s zoo. One of our biggest enjoyments was hearing her do animal sounds when she saw them; cows, sheep, and monkeys. She makes the same sound for sheep and goats; likewise for monkeys and gorillas. She even makes hand movements under the arms and facial expressions (or our idea of facial expressions) like monkeys. She was also fascinated by fish and turtles and I look forward to planning a day trip to the aquarium in Mystic, Ct.

Culture Day: 
May 20th was FCC’s annual Chinese Culture Day at Liberty State Park in New Jersey. It was phenomenal; much more than I ever expected. The richness of the culture emphasized the need for us to continue to expose Katerina to her culture, including the language. Unfortunately, the day was extremely windy and cool so we could not enjoy the outdoor activities and performances. She was too young for a lot of the events and performances, but she was enthralled with the Chinese dancing and with Mei-Mei. (more on Mei-Mei later).

Asian Festival:
May 27th at the Kensico Dam. Unlike FCC’s culture day, the weather was spectacular; beautiful blue skies, sunny and dry. I was manning the FCC orphanage assistance booth for an hour with Katerina (who was like a poster child!) after which Constantin, Joseph, Dad, Christopher, and Tess joined us. We sat under the tent in the shade and enjoyed the performances.

Beach: We’ve been to Oakland Beach a few times. The first was in early May with Aunt Susie; a beautiful day but a bit windy and cool. The most recent was a wonderful day in mid-June where we (Constantin, Joseph, Katerina and Joseph’s brother Anthony) met up with Uncle Bob & Aunt Susie for a very relaxing and enjoyable day at the beach. Katerina wearing her UV protective bathing suit (someone said it looks like she’s ready to go scuba diving) played in the sand and shallow water.

Playland:
One of my favorite places is Playland. I don’t go on any rides, but I love all the action. I’ve taken Katerina there twice now; once with Joseph in mid-May and once with Aunt Susie and Mom in late June. She is too young for many of the rides in the kiddie section but we take her on ones that will allow adults to ride with her. Joseph is game for anything! We have some really cute videos of her on the rides. BaBa has yet to see her at Playland but I’m sure we’ll all go there together soon.


Muscoot Farm:
The first time we went to Muscoot Farm was on Easter (non-Christian Orthodox) in April. We have since been there several times as it’s just a few miles up Rte. 100 from where we live. It is a Westchester County Park but also an actual working farm. The most fun is getting there right before feeding time (around 2:30-3:00pm) when the animals are all anticipating food. There’s a cacophony of bleats, neighs, crows, moos, etc. I am positive this is where Katerina has perfected her animal noises. Since there are no monkeys there, I’m guessing she learned ooh ooh ah ah ah from one of us.

Health & Behavior
Medical: We took Katerina to a pediatrician, Dr. Traister, who specializes in international adoptions, the Monday after her arrival. Although her records from China indicated all immunizations had been done, Dr. Traister tested her for immunology levels and found several to be lacking! She, of course, did not enjoy her blood being drawn and the next visit when she had to get several immunization injections. Other than that she is healthy, although with dry skin/eczema. We are constantly putting lotion on her. She had allergic reactions in the beginning and we are still trying to figure out what caused them. We cut off all food except rice initially and slowly added additional foods. We’ve narrowed the problem down to bananas or eggs.

Size: She is very petite and is only in the 5th percentile for height and the 15th percentile for weight. We have another visit coming up with the doctor and can’t wait to see if good loving and nourishment is reflected in her growth. Her shoe size has been 3 since she arrived and just seems to be crossing into 4’s. She is still wearing clothes that are for 12 months; 9 to 12 or 6 to 12 months fit best. Those that are 12 to 18 months are too big. I have tons of wonderful clothes that were given to us as gifts and will last us for a couple of years I’m sure because most of them were for 18 months and up. When she arrived, there were not many that fit and I HAD to go out shopping for her. Is there anything more fun than buying little girl clothes? I don’t think so.

Eating: She loves fruit, cheese, rice, pasta and some vegetables. She doesn’t like meat or chicken although my mother said she read that you should try something 20 times before giving up. Today, Constantin included ham in her rice and vegetables and she ate it. She has discovered forks and wants to eat everything with a fork. No spoons. If you give her a spoon she will throw it on the floor. She even eats her cereal & milk in the morning with a fork. She feeds herself and thank goodness for the pocket at the bottom of the bib where 25% of her food collects.


Sleep: Most of the time she goes to sleep between 8:30 and 9pm and wakes up between 7 and 7:30am. Perfect! Our routine is to give her a bath, read a goodnight book and say goodnight to everything in (and out of) the house on the way to the bedroom. Goodnight to the lamp, the rocking horse, the car outside the window, the tiger sculpture, the toys, the kitchen, and of course, Ma Ma, Ba Ba, and Ge Ge. Once in the bedroom we greet Chickoree Chick, give Katerina the little pillow and blanket she loves. The blanket, by the way, is not for covering up, it’s for hugging. She also has Baby Tad in the crib who keeps her amused with some lullabies and educates her on colors and shapes by pressing representations of such on his belly. We also know when she wakes up in the morning when we hear “Hello, I’m baby Tad. Touch the blue square” We put the lights down low and play the same CD of lullabies each night. One night I tried something different and she pointed to the CD player shaking her head and saying “No”. Depending on the amount of time between going into the crib and sleeping, we are sometimes treated, especially lately, to lengthy monologues of babble. We’re not sure who she is talking to but she’s very serious about it. She also sings the melody and tones/inflections of Mei-Mei songs. (More about Mei-Mei later).

Dental: She loves brushing her teeth, does so several times a day and does not want to give up the brush. We will need to take her to a dentist soon as I’ve read that it’s very important to receive dental care even at this age.

Hygiene: She loves to take baths. Only for a brief time was she terrorized because Constantin thought it was cute to turn the shower head on unexpectedly. For about 2 weeks she screamed when we brought her near the tub and would eye the shower head with severe distrust. We had to go in the tub with her or take her into the shower with us. We eventually installed a removable/handheld showerhead and keep it dangling in the tub when unused and she cautiously went back to her baths.

Pooping: She poops like a champ; once or twice a day. She knows when she made poop and will sometimes point to her diaper and say “pooh”. This is the first step toward potty training. We will wait until she’s ready; when she can let us know that she’s going to poop, not after the fact. Everything I’ve read says she will let us know and we will recognize when it’s time.

Temper: She’s got a bit of a temper and does not like to be told what to do. If she doesn’t get her way, watch out, everything near her ends up on the floor.
She can also be very sly. Sometimes when she knows she shouldn’t do something she will begin the act, look at me or Constantin with a little smile and either wait for us to say no or she will shake her head as if saying “I know I shouldn’t do this”.
For the first 6 weeks, she used to throw fits when she didn’t get her way. She would literally fling herself on the floor (on her stomach) and cry. We would then walk over to her, put out our hand; she’d take it and stand up. Fit over. The fits seemed to end in early May.

Favorite Things
Mei-Mei (More about Mei Mei later)
Chickoree Chick
Blanket
Dancing
Books
Her bedroom
Telephones
Remote Controls

Notable Moments
5/2/06 Says MaMa
5/4/06 Points to diaper and says “pooh”
5/5/06 Blows a kiss
5/25/05 Presents her forehead for us to kiss her when we ask for a kiss.
6/01/06 Kisses stuffed animals but not people.
6/10/06 Smiles on demand
6/15/06 Gives actual kisses
6/24/06 Repeats everything
6/30/06 Kissed everyone at Locomotion
7/3/06 Made monkey noises at the zoo

Genius Child or at least Cute Child Episodes
One day Constantin took the garbage bag out of the pail in the kitchen and walked outside. Katerina reached behind took a fresh bag from where we keep them behind the garbage pail under the sink and tried to put it in the pail.

On July 4th, Katerina was filling up pails of water from the pool and dumping them on peoples heads who were sitting in or around the pool. She walked over to Aunt Susie, put the pail down, took Susie’s hat off, picked up the pail and dumped the water on Susie’s head.

MEI MEI 


Mei Mei Hu is an educator and the creator of the Play & Learn Chinese series, which includes a language CD, the popular Dance & Learn with Mei Mei and the newly-released video Let's Go to School with Mei Mei. She came to the United States in 1983, after having taught English for several years in China at the well-known University of Science and Technology. In 1986 she received her master's degree in Education and began work as a Montessori teacher, guiding young children in their earliest lessons. It was her fifteen years of experience at the Montessori school that kindled her passion for teaching younger children and the place where her Chinese program was born and refined. In the meantime, Mei Mei had also been teaching Chinese language at Rhode Island College, which eventually led her to teaching positions at Providence College and, more recently, at Brown University.She’s killing us with Mei Mei. As soon as she wakes up she wants to watch the Mei Mei . Shortly thereafter she wants the Mei Mei CD put on her CD player and since we have a monitor in her room with extensions in the kitchen and office, Mei Mei is on throughout the house. I made the mistake of putting Mei Mei on my iPod and playing it for her in the car one day. Now we don’t even have her buckled in the car seat before she points to the car radio and says Mei Mei. Joseph is ready to pull his hair out but it has gotten to him as well. We heard him unknowingly singing one of the songs as he was laying rubber tiles under the baby pool.

China Girl

Just a quick post to let everyone know that they arrived safely last night before last at 5:30pm in Newark. We waited anxiously in terminal C. As they came out of customs, my heart started racing. As they walked closer toward us, I could see the top 1/3rd of a little head poking above the suitcases on the cart. Constantin picked Katerina up and walked towards me. She was tiny; smaller than I expected. She was precious. My heart was full of love and anticipation. He placed her in my arms and WHAAAAAAA; she cried and reached back for him. Shot down on the first try! Once they were out of the walkway, he placed her down and she began running all over the airport and heading for the elevator doors as they opened. She looked so adorable – so little, running, running, running – why she’s our own little Forrest Gump.

Once we got to the car, she wasn’t too thrilled to be put into the car seat, but as soon as the car started moving she was content. Constantin told me to put some music on, and sure enough, she started singing.

She was very wary of me at first and backed away each time I came near her. As the evening wore on, she began to tolerate me and even fed me some cheerios. She explored the entire house and played with a few toys. She loved her rocking chair and enjoyed climbing onto it, shaking her little body to make it rock, sliding off of it and started the whole procedure over again.

She went to sleep at 1:30am and woke up at 4am crying. After all, this was just her afternoon nap. Joseph was already up having breakfast and soon Emma joined us in the kitchen. And everyone was accounted for. She went down for her nap at 11:00am and I tried to wake her at 1pm to get her on the right schedule, but she was having none of it. I guess it’ll be a long night tonight. I had grand plans of taking her to the Westchester mall, parking the stroller in the sea of strollers outside City Limits while we had lunch, visiting Aunt Schmabe at Barnes and Noble. But no, it is now 3:30pm and she’s still sleeping. We are going to contact others who have gone through the same experience of bringing a child home from China and adjusting their schedule.

I saw some great photos in the camera which I hope we can download tonight so that I can post them on the Blog. No one brought a camera to the airport, but we took a couple of shots from my phone which I posted above. Once I can post the pictures we'll say Bye Bye to the blog because the real journey is beginning.

On The Move

It is morning in China and they are on their way to Beijing. Yesterday was the ceremony at the American Consulate with 40 other little Chinese girls headed to the USA. And what are the chances - another little girl had on the very same dress from Janie and Jack that Katerina was wearing for this special day.

After the consulate ceremony, they went back to the hotel and Katerina proceeded to walk in the bathroom and point to the bathtub. So, a bath it was. She loves playing in the bath. The crew went out to dinner at a Japanese (when in China.....) restaurant at the White Swan hotel. After dinner, Constantin took Katerina for a walk in the lobby and she was immediately drawn to the piano player; went over to him and did her singing bit. I think we may have a child prodigy on our hands. Brother Bob is already researching what guitar he wants to get for her.

Genius Child Alert: In addition to Bye Bye, she is now saying "Good Girl" and "Car".

Well, this will be the last post until after they are home and I will finally be able to upload a bunch of pictures. My biggest joy is that I did not kill Joseph's fish during this time no matter how hard I tried. I would continually walk past the fish tank and be shocked when they caught my attention. It was like I was seeing them for the first time, each time.

All is in place. The crib has been made up with the bedding. I had to run out today because I realized I didn't have a mattress pad. The changing table is in place with the lovely diaper pail beside it and the butt wipes close at hand - this will be a new one for me. I have never changed a diaper. The car seat has been installed in my car (thank you, George), the high chair is set up (thank you, George), the stroller is ready to roll (thank you, George). And our candles (electric) continue to burn in almost every window since Christmas awaiting Katerina's homecoming.


The Tradition of placing a Candle in the Window goes back to the Colonial times in the United States and back much further in time for other cultures. It is a Tradition practiced throughout the year. It symbolizes the warmth and security of the Family hearth and signals loyalty to Family members and loved ones who are not present in the home.

It certainly feels like Christmas and I can't wait to go to sleep so I can wake up in the morning to a very special day; Suzie's birthday!! That too.
Tomorrow I meet my daughter!
How awesome is that?
An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break." Ancient Chinese Belief

Countdown to Home Begins

Only 1 more night in China before they begin their journey home. The night before last Constantin was trying to get Katerina to sleep at around 8:30pm. At 10:30pm he called me and said he had given up and they were having a party. They were all sitting on the floor, eating, drinking and watching TV. She was very wound up. (I found out later he had given her some cheesecake in the afternoon. I bet she's never had sugar before. Joseph recognized the sugar high immediately!) I could hear her laughing and singing in the background. Constantin held the phone to her ear so that I could talk to her and she did the RCA dog head tilt move. I doubt that she's ever experienced a telephone before. The first time she saw TV, she went behind the box to look for the people.

Last night Emma and Joseph went out for dinner with the group while Constantin and Katerina stayed in the hotel room eating grilled cheese and french fries - yes, french fries again! I think Constantin continues to order french fries because he enjoys her ritual of dipping the fries in ketchup and feeding them to him. She was unusually happy in the crib last night and was singing/talking up a storm for about an hour before going to sleep. She also for the first time took and hugged a small teddy bear that Emma bought her. She's beginning to feel much more comfortable and at home with them.
Yesterday they went to the cultural center for 2 hours of folk singing and dancing. During the performance of a highly respected singer, Katerina burst into song at the top of her lungs and the audience laughed.

Genius child alert: This morning, after Constantin put her socks on, she ran, got her shoes and brought them to him.

I last spoke to them about an hour ago (11am their time on Tuesday) and they were out for a stroll and shopping. Katerina becomes U.S. citizen today. At 2:30am our time, she will be sworn in. Wouldn't it be great if starts belting out "I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy!"
Well, they leave Guangzhou tomorrow morning (Wednesday) and will make a connection in Beijing for Newark. All told (I verified it's told not tolled) they will be traveling for 22 hours to reach home. Hope they have lots of things to amuse Katerina. The balloons are losing some of their perkiness. I don't know if they'll make it. But the room and crib are ready. I spent this evening ironing the crib skirt, the window valence, washing sheets, etc. Bring her on - I'm ready.


She's apparently a picky eater and will enjoy something one day and not the next. At first, she loved congee and it was all she would eat. Then it was porridge. Constantin says she communicates what she wants by pointing. He takes her around the breakfast buffet and she points to what she wants. Lately, she's been eating cereal with soy milk, bananas, and orange juice. Unfortunately, there's no breakfast buffet at 38 Gordon Avenue so we'll have to come up with another system.

Monkey See Monkey Do

As each day dawns, Katerina becomes more and more a part of her forever family. She is bonding to all three of them. It's odd that I am so much a part of this and she doesn't even know I exist.

The flight to Guangzhou was fine, but on the descent, she started crying. We're guessing her ears were popping. It was a long walk from the terminal to the bus that would take them to the hotel but apparently, Katerina was having a grand time in her stroller. She was talking to everyone as she passed them by and people were talking back to her. We thought she was just talking Chinese goo goo gaga, but apparently, she is actually saying things as we've been told by the bilingual guide. One morning Emma was with her in the dining room of the hotel and Katerina was chatting away. Michael, the guide, told Emma that Katerina wanted to eat. Constantin said she must think the three of them are awfully stupid.

They arrived at the hotel late after a one-hour bus ride and went to sleep more easily than she has been. The next day they took her to a park which had a kids playground and she really enjoyed the slide. On the way back to the hotel she was singing in Chinese in the stroller and again, talking to people as she passed them. So far she has only picked up one English word/expression and that is bye-bye. She uses it whenever she or someone is leaving. She waves and says bye-bye. In fact, when she was talking to a guard in the airport, it was in Chinese, but when she was leaving she waved and said bye-bye. Isn't she brilliant??

She also loves to mimic. One evening Constantin had french fries and he gave her one after dipping it in ketchup. She spit it out. The next night he had french fries again, (what's up with that? Aren't we in China??) and a few times she picked one up, dipped it in ketchup and fed it to him. She also observed him wiping his fingers on a napkin after eating the french fries so she picked up a fry (no ketchup) and after eating rubbed her fingers on the napkin. I tell you, folks, this is a genius child!! 
Guangzhou is very westernized compared to Beijing and Nanning. Probably the Hong Kong influence. They are only 45 minutes away by Hydrofoil

Back Onlilne

After an evening of technical difficulties, my network is up and I'm back online. They are off to Guangzhou this morning (their evening), they actually should be arriving 8:30am our time. This is the final leg of the journey where Katerina will be issued her visa to enter the US. The US Consulate appointment is on Monday, March 20th and they will leave for Beijing and home on the 22nd. What's really neat is because of the time change their flight will only be 1 hour from Beijing to Newark. (If only it were true - I can't imagine 13 hours on a flight with a 17-month-old!!)

My staff, friends, and co-workers at JHHLS threw me a beautiful shower at work today. I walked into what I thought was our monthly department meeting; agenda in hand, handouts on a new policy, and of course some pictures of Katerina from China, to a chorus of SURPRISE. The room was beautifully decorated with balloons secured with baby bottles full of mints, rubber duckies floating in bowls of water, and of course a mound of presents. As soon as I receive the pictures I will post them. The warm wishes and smiling faces were just precious. These are the things memories are made of. A really great side benefit is that I have all these balloons for Wednesday. I hope they keep their buoyancy. I must've been quite a sight tooling up the West Side Highway filled to the brim with packages and balloons flying everywhere!

I then went to a lovely intimate wedding ceremony for a friend/co-worker. What a day for celebrations!

Guangzhou is the capital of the Guangdong province which used to be known as Canton (as in Cantonese). Read more Like Athens of Greece and Rome of Italy, Guangzhou also has a history of more than 2,800 years. There are a lot of interesting legends concerning its past. One of the beautiful stories which give the city its name Goat Town says that five gods riding on five goats brought the first grain to the city. So, it is also known as the City of Five Goats. Besides tales and stories, here and there stand monuments of the city's democratic and revolutionary past. The monument to the Anti-British struggle at San Yuan Li is in remembrance of the 1841 uprising against a British invading force. The Huang Hua Gang Park keeps alive the spirit of the 72 martyrs killed in a 1911 uprising against the Manchu dynasty. The National Peasant Movement Institute is the former cadre-training school founded and run by Mao Zedong and Zhou En Lai in 1925-1926. The Guangzhou Memorial Garden is in memory of those who lost their lives during the Communist Uprising in 1927.

I am working at home today awaiting the delivery of the "temporary" crib and changing table which is being loaned to us by the store where we purchased the nursery furniture until ours is ready. Off to work now. Will post more tonight after I speak to them.

One more picture of Katerina from the one batch I received. Hopefully, I will get more from Guangzhou.

Cry Baby

Katerina woke up yesterday in a great mood and even tolerated the torture of being changed better than usual. They took her sightseeing in the morning followed by a stroller ride in the park which she loved. As delightful as the day was the evening was a challenge. It was a "cry baby" night as Emma put it. Everything was wrong, nothing was pleasing her and no one could figure out what she wanted or what might be bothering her. Constantin said it was so painful and frustrating to not know how to help her.

When she gets angry or frustrated she walks away from everyone, faces the other way and plops herself down on the floor. She'll show them! Then someone walks over to her, reaches out their hand and she'll take it, stand up and go on her merry way.

Yet again, she did not want to go to sleep. I posted an Email to my Yahoo Group of adoptive parents from China telling them of the problem and someone replied that it's very common among Chinese adopted children to be terrified of going to sleep. They're afraid that when they wake up, you'll be gone. "Well, little one, for better or for worse, you are now with your forever family." With a stroke of genius, Joseph decided to put her in the stroller and roll her around the hotel suite to soothe her. It worked. She started to get sleepy and whatever she was holding in her hands started to fall to the ground one by one. Next, the little head started veering to the side and she was out. Ah, success; and she slept right through until Constantin woke her up this morning.

The dynamics of this group is a riot. Emma is in charge of changing and I'm told at one point she (jokingly) told Constantin and Joseph to "shut up - I'm in charge of outfits". She'd have tough competition if Schmabe was there!! Joseph is the one Katerina seems to have bonded to the most. Sure, Emma says, he's the fun guy. He doesn't torture her by changing, feeding, etc. Apparently, whenever Joseph walks into the room she smiles and lights up. And she doesn't want anyone to leave the room. When Emma left last night to go to her room (next door), she cried and looked behind furniture for her and eventually went to the door determined to will her back into the room. She's also a bit fussy about things. When she has items to play with, she lines them up just so and you can't disturb them. Constantin brought out the crayons to draw yesterday, but all she wanted to do was take them out of the box and put them back in. And if she put one in wrong (butt side up instead of point side up), she'd take it out, turn it around and put it back in again. Like mother like daughter! I told you they knew what they were doing when they matched us.

Finally

I was awakened at 1:00am to a wonderful surprise; pictures. And (drum roll) here’s Katerina! I only received a few and they are primarily from the first day with her little Mao face. I did replace yesterday’s posted picture as well with one of her with the balls. We have a picture of her with her favorite toy – the bowls & lids. We also have a picture with the cookie and the bib that she wouldn’t take off (and ended up sleeping in). I am going back to sleep now and will post more tomorrow.

A New Day

What a difference one day can make. Today, (it's evening there now), was the adoption. When they arrived at the Civil Affairs office they were brought to a reception room with the other 3 families and Katerina burst into activity. There were huge balls, as big as she is -the kind used for exercise - and she and the Ayres daughter were playing and laughing out loud having a blast. We found out later, during the adoption process, that Katerina and the Ayres daughter were in foster care together. They would spend their days at the orphanage and go home with one of the nannies. I understand that this is a practice in many orphanages once the girls are matched. I guess it's like a halfway house to help with the transition. The other 2 girls were not in foster care and seem to be having more difficulty. They are not very responsive with their families or their surroundings and are only quiet if being held. They scream if their parents try to put them on the floor to play. Maybe the foster care helped in developing self-confidence and a sense of well being.

Now that he knows about the foster care, Constantin is connecting a few dots. As they left the room yesterday, after receiving Katerina, he saw a few Chinese women in the lobby. One put her hands over her face and cried loudly when Constantin walked from the room with Katerina. We had seen this same reaction from a foster mother in a documentary that was following a group of adoptees - "The Lost Girls of China", but since he did not know at that time that Katerina was in foster care, he just noted it and thought it was curious. We have the name of the foster mother and will certainly reach out to her. I'm delighted to know that there was someone who especially cared for Katerina and someone to whom Katerina bonded in this way.

The adoption ceremony was great. Katerina in her party dress that was 2 sizes too big. Constantin said she looked like a gypsy. At the ceremony, an official held a clear box where you put your envelopes of money and you received your adoption certificate. The orphanage staff brought out a bag with all the items we had sent over in the care package and they had made an album of pictures they had taken of her. What a treasure. We were also given a lot more information on her routines.

Once back on the bus, Katerina followed Constantin in waving and saying "Bye Bye". Wow, I never thought I'd get so excited about "Bye Bye"!!

Back at the hotel, Constantin and Katerina took a nap while Emma and Joseph went to the 5- story Walmart. They bought a stroller and a soccer ball which Katerina and Joseph played within the room and had lots of fun kicking and throwing it around. Again, she was laughing out loud. Very delighted and pleased with herself. She seems to be adjusting very well to them. She's no longer scared and is much more at ease.

As I spoke to them this evening or morning depending on whether you're in China or USA, she was walking around with a cookie and would come over to Emma to hold the cookie while she took a bite. Then she'd take back the cookie and walk around until she wanted another bite.

She's apparently very possessive about everything she likes and will not give it up. She also doesn't seem to like change, but then gets used to it and doesn't want it to change again. When they put a bib on her to eat, she cried, but when they tried to take it off, she didn't want to give it up. She cried when they got on the bus but then didn't want to get off the bus.

It's so hard for me not to be there. I can't wait to speak to them in the morning to hear how the day was and at night when they're getting up and planning the day. I'm delighted to hear how well she and Joseph are interacting. Yesterday, not too much, but today they've done a lot of playing and laughing.

I have passed on everyone's blog comments and good wishes to Emma, Constantin, and Joseph. They send their love and regards. Ady, Joseph was looking specifically for comments from you. Without having any pictures, I'm really stretching it to find some graphic interest to post! As it has been so hectic, they did not want to trouble the other families who brought laptops, with requests to send out pictures. Now that the adoption is finalized I think everyone can breathe a little and we may have some pictures soon.

Well until the next update .........Bye Bye!

GOTCHA

The crew left Beijing at 7:40am and reached their hotel rooms in Nanning at 2pm.

Nanning is right on the border of Vietnam - only about 180 miles from Nanning to Hanoi.

At 2:30pm they had to be at the Civil Affairs Office to "receive" Katerina. After choking down some lunch they arrived and were brought to a room with the 3 other families adopting from the same orphanage. Other rooms were filled with families adopting from other orphanages. "They're here, they're here" someone cried out. And in walked a caregiver from the orphanage with the first baby; it was not Katerina. But the 2nd one was. And they recognized her immediately. She looks exactly like her pictures. The caregiver handed her to Constantin and she began crying and reaching out to the caregiver who held her hand. Emma said she can tell the caregiver loves Katerina by the way she looked at her, smiled at her, held her hand so gently and affectionately. Katerina was scared stiff, poor little thing. The other 2 families received their children and 2 (Katerina and another) were crying the whole time. The other 2 were apparently shell-shocked and were very nonchalant (until later I hear). They were all dressed in the same pink pants and jackets - Constantin said they looked like a soccer team. After everyone received their babies it was time to go back to the hotel; Katerina crying all the way.

Once in the hotel room, she began walking and walking and walking which calmed her down. She kept staring at her new family and not cracking a smile. (Constantin called it her Mao Tse Tung face.)  Very alert and responsive to her name Guo Cai. She didn't like the stuffed animals or the toys Constantin had brought with him. Emma brought out the plastic disposable bowls with lids I had packed and those became her favorite toy. She kept putting the lids on and taking them off. Standing up the whole time. Emma gave her Cheerios and showed her how to chew.

Physically she was clean, beautiful, had very dry skin (eczema) and a little congestion. I'm told she's very independent, not a moaner, strong personality and knows what she wants - they knew what they were doing when they matched us!

She cried when they changed her for bed and then she began walking and walking for an hour and 1/2. Mom went to her room to sleep, exhausted but happy and content. After all, this is her granddaughter!

Constantin put on the TV and she seemed to like it. They fell asleep (she in her crib between Joseph and Constantin's beds) and slept until 2am. Constantin awoke to her speaking in Chinese followed by crying. After soothing her back to sleep she didn't wake until 6am in the morning. It is now 8:00am there on the 14th and they have a 9am appointment for the adoption at the Civil Affairs Office. Apparently, last night was a trial run and they could give the babies back if they didn't want them. FAT CHANCE!!

She had congee for breakfast, but still no smiles. I was on the phone and heard her crying when Emma was changing her. Wow, she sounds like a baby!! I could hear Emma soothing her "don't cry little one" and smooching sounds. She's wearing a party dress today for her adoption! They then headed downstairs for breakfast but Katerina was scared of the elevator. I hung up as Joseph was suggesting they walk down the stairs. By the way, I understand Joseph makes a beeline for the door when Katerina poops. You can run, my boy, but you can't hide! By the time they come home, I bet he'll be an old hand at diaper changing.

It will still be 10 days before they're home. After the adoption they must wait for the passport - 3 days - then they fly to Guangzhou where the American Consulate is located and apply for a visa, more paperwork, medical exams, etc. Once they have the Visa, they can begin their journey home.

I am out of my mind not having pictures. I begged them today to try to find some way to send pictures. Apparently, Constantin can't send them from the camera phone because you need to be a Chinese citizen to subscribe to that kind of service. Huh????????? Some of the families brought their laptops so maybe they can take some pictures and Email them to me. PLEASE!!